First Impressions

First Impressions are extremely important. Most of the time a first impression can make or break any further opportunities of connecting with another person.

How first impressions work

One thing that we all have in common is that we judge.

We judge people because it helps us to identify patterns. These patterns help us to understand other people in relation to ourselves and our own frame of reference.

When you meet any person for the first time you generate a series of first impressions (judgements) about the other person.

How we judge, and what factors we use in order to judge other people, varies widely. For example: If you meet person X and person X is tall, and you like tall people, your overall first impression will be better (or higher) than for someone who is shorter. If height is not relevant to you, then meeting a tall person will not affect your first impression much at all.

First impressions greatly depend on what people consider important. If the person you are meeting likes well dressed and well groomed people, and it is important for you to create a good first impression, you should groom and dress well.

Your Type

All people have a preferred type of person. Type is a combination of physical attributes, body type and even initial energy or vibe. Your type may be tall and skinny with a friendly vibe or energy. (Or completely something else…)

During initial judgement, or “first impressions” you rate the other person on how closely they match your “type” (what you believe your requirements to be).

Remember that the other person will also rate and judge you, based on what they believe they want or need.


How To Create a Good First Impression

Before you actually meet the person IRL, you should collect as much information as possible about what the other person wants.

Collect Information

Before meeting IRL, you can collect information by using flirty banter, just chatting or by simply asking directly. (Ask the other person in a chat or text: “Is height important to you?”)

You need to collect as much information as possible in order to prepare for the best first impression. You do not need to understand whether the other person likes bad breath or not. (Everyone, including you, dislikes bad or rotten breath) So, you should avoid asking dumb questions, unless you are part of a special group of people that specifically likes rotten breath, of course.

Generally all people dislike bad breath, dirty finger nails, poor hygiene and bad self care stuff. So you can safely skip all of these and ensure that you are clean when you meet other people.

If the person you are thinking about meeting does not like very tall people at all and you are a very tall person (9ft and 800 pounds), then you should be open and honest with the other person. Tell them that you are 9 feet tall and weigh 800 pounds. If they are not interested in meeting you, it is what it is, accept it and move on.  You will eventually meet someone that likes extremely tall people.

Understanding or acting on the information you collected

Understand yourself and what you are able to physically provide, and what not. If you are physically very short and the other person absolutely only likes very tall people, your overall first impression will be negatively affected. No matter what you do or try to do, as you do not meet the other persons body type requirements.

Unfortunately many times where physical appearance is extremely important, there is simply not much you could do to improve your first impression score. The good news is that there are many other things that could absolutely increase your first impression score. For example: If you have an amazing sense of humor and immediately cause hysterical laughter this could potentially dwarf any negative physical shortcoming!

Always be totally open and honest with all other people about your physical appearance. Just as much as you would not like to be cat-fished, someone else will not like it either.

Always try to improve your first appearance scores by not only meeting, but also exceeding, the expectations of the other person.

Regarding your own first impression judgements, try to be more open minded. Try to identify your own prejudice and try to be more tolerant of first impression red flags. Sometimes something negative is not as bad as your first impression judgement. Sometimes you could actually accept or move past the initial issue.